Originally posted @BMBR on October 3, 2017
Apparently I’m fashionable late to the squeeing party for this author. I haven’t read their first book, but I’ll be fixing that sooner rather than later. I liked this book and enjoyed it more so as the second half came along with its sweet and sexy friends to lovers journey.
Alex and Christian (aka Squirrel) met in Spain three years prior to this story unfolding. Alex stepped up at a bar and saved Christian from being the 18 year old prey to all of the lions that were out on the hunt. Alex pretended to be Christian’s boyfriend and from there they formed a deep bond of friendship. Christian was looking for a mentor and with the 12 year age difference between them, Alex was the perfect candidate. Living in different parts of Germany, they exchanged emails, phone calls, and even visits over the three years.
Alex was a university lecturer by day and a
porn romance novel writer by night. “I was high-maintenance and an intellectual snob. That was why I mostly lived out my fantasies through my writing.” Alex writes under a pen name and only his best friend knows what he writes. Besides the few friends he has, Alex was very lonely until Christian transfers to a medical school where he lives.
We don’t get inside Christian’s head outside of the inferences we gather through Alex’s thoughts and observations. Christian is very smart and responsible. He adores Alex and you can tell he craves any time Alex is willing to give him. He has hero worship going on and wants to know more about the tight lipped Alex. Christian is also a virgin at 21. He has a very controlling mother who scheduled every minute of his day which left little time for the one hand job and few make out sessions he had under his belt.
I loved Alex and Christian together as friends and then as lovers. Unfortunately, Alex suffered from a very common medical condition where his head is firmly lodged up his ass for more than half of the book. Alex was soooooo noble with his mentor/”brotherly” role. He fought very hard for so long against his feelings and doing the “right” thing that it got in his way. Their relationship was one sided for the first half. It was such a unique dynamic because Alex was there to be and do anything for Christian and all Christian really wanted was for Alex to be himself and give himself. Alex was caught up on their 12 year age difference which wasn’t a problem to Christian. Their characters were written in a way where Christian seemed to be the “adult” and more sensible one. When the head/ass removal surgery was finally complete, it was game ON.
There was a lot of heat throughout. The heat in the first half came from the scenes Alex was writing for his novels and his many dreams. Those didn’t do anything for me but I understand that it was necessary to show his style as a writer and how love translates through sex. I do wish the sex frequency was more balanced and not so heavy on the dream and novel scene front; The MCs got the short end of the stick in that department. Their first time together, I think legit fireworks shot out of my kindle. The tension and heartbreaking build up had me on the edge of my seat begging them to make a move.
“There was a moment of stillness. Neither of us spoke or moved, yet our breathing seemed as loud as screams.”
Alex really steps it up when he decides to give himself to Christian. It was almost the equivalent of a boombox playing a love song outside your window.
I’m a big fan of the secondary characters, Dieter and Mattias. Hopefully Mattias gets a story next with Simon. *hint hint* I even liked Christian’s crazy mother because although she was a hot mess of rigid control, she had the best of intentions and loved him.
I wish there was more insight into Christian through his POV to “see” his range of moods. I would have enjoyed his thoughts when he seemed more melancholy instead of his always eager and full of life persona. All in all, I liked this book and loved the 2nd half. I would definitely recommend it and will be on the lookout for more from Roe Horvat.
“I love this love. It’s guilty; it’s unavoidable. Mine. The only thing worth anything, and it’s mine.”
Copy provided for honest review.